recovering from depression

• Do you feel tired, indifferent, or just generally down?
• Do you wonder what the point of your life is?
• Why do you bother carrying on?

men and depression

ALTHOUGH WIDESPREAD, DEPRESSION IN MEN, AS WITH MANY OTHER MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES, IS QUITE MISUNDERSTOOD AND OFTEN REMAINS UNDIAGNOSED AS MEN ARE RELUCTANT TO TALK TO THEIR FAMILIES AND SEE THEIR GP.

Why? Simply because most men can’t explain what is going on for them regarding depression. Having someone (wife, husband, partner, friend GP) keeps asking you what is wrong makes us feel more detached or even angry because we don’t have the words to explain what is happening. It often seems easier to just play along with things and keep quiet.

We don’t have the words because, for most of us men, we do not have the language. We have been told from an early age that talking about our emotions is something men just don’t do; we just get on with life. We might feel sad and expect to get over it quite soon, but depression differs greatly from sadness.

If we were just sad, we would easily know what has made us sad; bereavement, relationship breakdown, losing our job, Liverpool being beaten by Manchester United (ok, that last one would probably lead to depression!) or illness.

If we are depressed, it is just not clear what we are depressed about. How do we explain why we are directing our anger at ourselves? Working with depression is often another way to manage our anger or shame.

Working together, we can find ways of helping you deal with the depression – helping you understand what is going on. Once we know what is going on, we can find the best tools and skills for you to regain control of your life and relationships.

A simple rule of counselling is the sooner you ask for help, the easier it will be for you to get better.

signs you might be affected by depression

Loss of energy

Reduced/loss of sex drive

Changes in appetite

Exhaustion/feeling tired all the time

Change in sleep patterns

Restlessness

Alcohol or drug abuse

Feeling guilty

Feeling angry or violent

Losing interest in many aspects of everyday life

Feeling sad or nervous

Feeling alone

Taking unnecessary risks

Thinking about death or suicide*

* IF YOU ARE THINKING OF SUICIDE PLEASE CONTACT YOUR GP OR THE SAMARITANS FOR SPECIALIST HELP AS SOON AS POSSIBLE

men and women deal with depression differently

Depression is a severe illness, but men and women deal with depression in different ways. Men look for others to blame, while women tend towards self-loathing.

DEPRESSION

how men deal with depression

• Focus on blaming others
• create conflict by being angry, irritated, or suspicious
• try to get back under control by controlling everything
• find solace in addictions: porn. drugs, alcohol, box sets, sport
• finds it difficult to talk to others

DEPRESSION

how women deal with depression

• focus on blaming themselves
• feeling sad, worthless, and hopeless
• avoid conflicts and struggles to set boundaries
• finds solace in food, friends, and ‘love’
• move towards others: talking about despair